That Hug You Don’t Want to Let Go of

We can’t be together, shouldn’t get together.
But here we are in a lingering hug goodbye.
Was just to be a cordial “nice seeing you,”
some how neither of us have let go yet.

Our hands are now clasped together.
Now we both know we’re feeling the same.
We pull each other close, your breasts against me,
I’m on the edge of not being able to resist you.

Will we be able to let go now and end this hug?
Can you please let go and run away home?
Your mouth is too close to my neck, your breath,
Any farther you go, your eyes will bring home.

Okay, I’m going to break this off while I can.
Fuck, your breathing is way too close now,
drilling futility into my will to break free.
We’re already fucked, then you say “fuck me!”

Interview with CiCi – stylist – mother – student – porn watcher – 31 years old

Cecilia, who goes by CiCi, is a hair stylist, sometimes my stylist. She is also a student and an artist. She asked me to help her with some web stuff she is working on; also, I had some art supplies I wanted to give her – that I’ve had sitting around going to no use.

This is her second time here. The first was to get some art supplies. We’ve also spoken over the phone three or four times, mainly to talk about a website she is building.

I texted her a link to this blog and told her she’d be fascinating to interview. I figured she wouldn’t do an interview, but felt she probably wouldn’t hold the blog against me either way. She called me the other day to asked me something business related, and also asked if I still wanted to do an interview. So now she is here at my house to do this.

CiCi is 31 years old, light brown hair, 5″ 6″ tall, very thin, big chest (not sure if real or not), and has a big smile. She is wearing tight fitting black pants, a white blouse and stylish sandals.

Duncan: Welcome CiCi

CiCi: Thank you, excited to do this.

Duncan: So, you have a boyfriend living with you, right?

CiCi: Yes.

Duncan: And you were married? Kids?

CiCi: Never married, I have a daughter from a previous relationship. Long story.

Duncan: How’s your current relationship? Your boyfriend?

CiCi: It’s pretty good. Ups and downs like everybody I guess, but okay.

Duncan: Does he know you are doing this interview?

CiCi: No, I’d rather keep this too myself, not have to explain it.

Duncan: Where does he think you are?

CiCi: At school working on my art project. I usually go in a few nights a week as I don’t have a painting space at home.

Duncan: What is the project for, what class are you taking?

CiCi: Oil Painting II

Duncan: Have you taken life Drawing?

CiCi; Yes, last year.

Duncan: Did you like it? Was it arousing?

CiCi: I liked it, improved my figure drawing a lot. I wouldn’t say arousing. Models weren’t exactly super models. Now, had Brad Pitt been posing, it may have been a different story.

Duncan: Yea, I found life drawing very helpful when I took it. I’ve posed for it too.

CiCi: You modeled for a class? When?

Duncan: In college and last Semester. Had you taken it then, I might have been one of your models, LOL, that would have been awkward.

CiCi: So wild. What was that like? You’d done it before you said?

Duncan: The first time was interesting. Modeled for a class taught by the same grad student who I had semester before for the same class. Sort of had a crush on her too, to make things even more crazy.

CiCi: You had a crush on your drawing teacher so you modeled for her class? LOL, clever approach.

Duncan: Noo, I signed up through the art department, was assigned two classed to model for, one happened to be hers. She was much older and married, I thought she was hot though.

CiCi: Oh, well that must have been a quite the surprise for you, and for her probably?

Duncan: It was pretty crazy. Got even crazier – she later hired me to pose for some paintings for her Masters thesis or project or whatever.

CiCi: She must have been impressed with your modelling.

Duncan: Something like that. Long story, but this is your interview.

CiCi: I don’t think I could do that, very brave of you. I’m impressed.

Duncan: Well I’m no Brad Pitt and much older than the first time I did it. LOL, nobody offered me a job posing for them this time around.

CiCi: Well you’re younger and a lot better looking than the guy we had in my class, too bad I didn’t wait and take that class this year.

Duncan: Ah, thanks. I’d not have minded having someone like you modeling for one of my classes as well! Are your breasts real?

CiCi: 100%, why do you think they aren’t?

Duncan: They seem extra big for your frame, and extra perky? That sounded like a criticism, let me rephrase. You appear to have really nice boobs – particularly striking with your slender, awesome body.

CiCi: LOL, saved yourself there did ya? Nope, all real. Big yes, perky no. That’s all bra trickery.

Duncan: May I see them.

CiCi: May you see my breasts?

Duncan: Yes, if possible?

CiCi: Why?

Duncan: just curious what you look like, and if you’ll do it – let me see. We can move on if you are bothered or offended by the request or topic.

CiCi: You’re fine, am just surprised you’re asking me that.

Duncan: Why are you surprised that I asked you?

CiCi: just that we kind of know each other, in a more professional capacity I guess? I don’t know, just surprised you would ask me that.

Duncan: I assure you, It is purely out of aesthetic and artistic curiosity, along with dedication to my readers, that I am asking if I may see your breasts,

CiCi: LOL, sure it is, I think you just want to see boobs.

Duncan: No doubt about that! You want to show me or move on?

CiCi: Are you serious, you really want to see?

Duncan: Definitely.

CiCi: Right now?

Duncan: Sure, yes. Can you just take your shirt and bra off, let me see you topless for a minute, then put them back on?

CiCi: LOL, whatever, alright.

(CiCI takes her shirt of and puts it next to  her on my dinning room table, then takes her bra off drops it on top of her shirt. She give me a “hear you go” gesture; she has a cute, smirky smile on her face)

Duncan: No doubt they are real, very nice!

CiCi: Yup, All real. You look surprised, Didn’t think I’d do this?

Duncan: Sort of surprised, thank you so much.

CiCi: Not a big deal, although, I couldn’t imagine being totally nude in front of a class, impressed you could do that.

Duncan: Gorgeous, awesome, thank you!

CiCi: You’re welcome.

(CiCi puts her bra and shirt back on again)

Duncan: Okay, so I wanted to ask you some questions about what just happened. I was having a discussions with some readers who asked how I get people to be so open and impulsive, or do stuff like you just did. So, I thought It would be interesting to ask about that.

CiCi: Okay?

Duncan: Why did you show me your breasts?

CiCi: You asked to see them, should I not have?

Duncan: No, you defiantly should have. Why did you agree to do it? Have I seduced you? Paid you? Sedated you? Would you show anyone your boobs, anytime?

CiCi: None of those things. Definitely don’t show anyone by boobs hmmm, good question.

Duncan: I think it is great, and I totally wanted to see your boobs! I am not trying to question your choice to show me, just wanting to understand it more. What would you say to someone reading this interview, if they ask you same questions, “Why did you take your top off, instead of telling Duncan to pound sand?”

CiCi: I don’t think you actually thought I would, so I called your bluff? I guess I figure if you had the nerve to ask, why not. I trust you’re not going to get creepy, we have privacy, so what’s the harm?

Duncan: Did you enjoy me seeing you topless? Regret it?

CiCi: Was a bit spontaneous and forbidden, so yea, I guess I enjoyed it. No regrets. Plus, the look on your face was priceless, worth it just to see that.

Duncan: What look? It was a happy look. Now I’m embarrassed.

CiCi: Don’t worry about it, I’m the one who should be embarrassed and I’m not.

Duncan: I won’t ask you to show them, but my readers wish to know what color your panties are? Are they g-string or anything fancy?

CiCi: Sorry, nothing fancy. White..

Duncan: What does your boyfriend like about you? Your boobs? Your body? Legs? Style? Ass? etc.

CiCi: I hope he likes my fantastic personality? My heart? I know that’s not what you mean, um, I think he does like my breasts? My ass I would say probably?

Duncan: What do you like about him physically?

CiCi: um, his hair. His biceps and chin.

Duncan: Not his cock?

CiCi: It’s fine. It’s just not an aspect that stands out (no pun indented) or attracts me to him the most.

Duncan: I’m surprised you wore ugly panties after having read some other interviews, what if I’d have asked to see them?

CiCi: LOL, who said they were ugly? I said they’re nothing fancy.

Duncan: What sexual position is your favorite?

CiCi: Um, probably doggy or cowgirl I believe it’s called?

Duncan: Have you ever had a three way?

CiCi: Nope.

Duncan: Would you? Do you want one? If so, guy-guy-girl or -girl-girl-guy?

CiCi: Maybe, depends. I’ve thought about it once or twice. Two guys for sure.

Duncan: Do you have two guys in mind? Who would you want to do that with?

CiCi: Not off hand. Strangers would be best for that sort of thing I think. Would be too weird if we all knew each other.

Duncan: Are you shaved?

CiCi: Heavily groomed.

Duncan: Have you had anal?

CiCi: Yes.

Duncan: Do you like it?

CiCi: There have been times I liked it. Not something I do often.

Duncan: The last orgasm you had, was it by yourself masturbating or with your boyfriend?

CiCi: What if it was neither? I’m kidding, it was, um, by myself actually.

Duncan: Do you ever desire other men? Or, just your boyfriend?

CiCi: I guess, not anyone in particular.

Duncan: So you want to fuck someone else, why, because you want some variety?

CiCi: I didn’t say that.

Duncan: I know, I’m asking. Do you want to fuck another man? Not asking if you plan to or would, do you want to?

CiCi: Yes.

Duncan: What kind of man? A stranger? A coworker? A friend?

CiCi: A stranger I guess. I mean, not a lurking stranger in a dark ally, but someone I meet somewhere and click with or something?

Duncan: Do you have this desire often? To fuck another man that is?

CiCi: Yes, fairly often I guess.

Duncan: So you’d probably do it? In the right situation? if you meet a stranger that you were very attracted to Perhaps ?

CiCi: Maybe. Probably. Why, do you want it to be you? You trying to fuck me Duncan?

Duncan: No, OMG, just asking questions, wasn’t suggesting me – I’m not a stranger.

CiCi: I know, just messing with you. LMAO

CiCi: Got me, nice one.

Duncan: If you met two guys at a club or on vacation, if they were hot enough, would you do a three way with them?

CiCi: Maybe, doubtful.

Duncan: Where do you masturbate since you live with someone?

CiCi: When he’s at work.

Duncan: In your bed?

CiCi: Usually, not always.

Duncan: What the most scandalous or nasty thing you’ve done?

CiCi: Um, probably, well I’m not sure. Maybe this interview, LOL, I’m kidding.

Duncan: Wow, you must be very pure and virtuous, if you have no answer for that question.

CiCi: I’m not, just can’t thinking of anything. Okay, I do watch porn if that counts?

Duncan: Really?

CiCi: Yes.

Duncan: What do you like to watch? Where do you watch it? What websites? So many questions.

CiCi: I watch different stuff. I like watching live cams like on chaturbate, sometimes pornhub. I just watch couples mainly.

Duncan: Why do you like that? What do you like about it?

CiCi: It is stimulating I guess? Why does anyone like porn?

Duncan: Interesting.

CiCi: I’m not obsessed or anything, I just watch it sometimes.

Duncan: Let’s talk about chaturbate, or watching live cams, what do you like watching?

CiCi: Couples.

Duncan: Doing what?

CiCi: Playing around, having sex, whatever.

Duncan: Threesomes ever?

CiCi: Yup, that can be good too.

Duncan: Interesting. Do you like watching younger couples? Interracial, bondage, anything in particular.

CiCi: Not really. Just hot guys, sexy couples doing intimate things.

Duncan: Do you like the guys with big dicks? Like watching that?

CiCi: Yes, totally.

Duncan: So you like to watch couples having sex live on cam, especially when the guy as a huge cock, I’d never have guessed that about you. Love it.

CiCi: LOL, Not regularly. I do sometimes.

Duncan: Do you masturbate when watching this?

CiCi: Of course. LOL, now I’m going to be remembered as the porn girl. I kind of wish I wouldn’t have mentioned it, really don’t watch this stuff that often.

Duncan: How often?

CiCi: LOL, once a week? Okay, so maybe sort of often. Can you scratch all that, about the porn? Can I go hide somewhere now?

Duncan: No, it’s fine. Plus, it’s the nastiest thing you’ve done, not so bad. I watch porn, most guys do, maybe most women do too for all I know.

CiCi: You think? Anyway, now I feel undressed, was much easier revealing my boobs.

Duncan: I can exclude anything you want.

CiCi: I’m fine. I’m actually perplexed that i feel embarrassed about it. I must have some guilt about it or something? Anyway, keep it.

Duncan: Okay, well I think it’s cool. It’s nothing to be ashamed of –  I’ve watched girls on there a few times, should check out the couples.

Duncan: What can they, that webcam stars, do that your boyfriend can’t?

CiCi: Last and stay hard forever. Unique positions. Ejaculate gallons. get huge erections. They are anomalies, that’s what makes people want to watch I guess.

Duncan: So your boyfriend is average in bed and you’re happy with it, is that what your saying?

CiCi: It’s okay, yes. I don’t expect him to be superman, and he Is not.

Duncan: What does he do?

CiCi: Manager at a tire store branch. I’ll not mention the chain, one of the big ones.

Duncan: How did you meet him?

CiCi: He is friends with a guy my friend, another stylist is dating. They sort of set us up, invited us both out.

Duncan: So he moved in with you? Any regrets about that? Getting bored with him?

CiCi: Yes, he pays half the rent and bills, it helps me afford school. I wish I had house to myself sometimes but it would be hard to just kick him out now. Bored? well, not sure I would use that word. But, in so many words, yea. LOL. Is it that obvious? I guess being here doing a sex interview might have been your first clue?

Duncan: Ah, and I thought you were here to try to fuck me, but you’re just bored.

CiCi: Can’t both be true?

Duncan: I’m just messing with you.

CiCi: I know, me too.

Duncan: Damn, you’re hard to rile.

CiCi: I am. The porn stuff got me a little nervous, but yea, not much you can say that would fool me or shock me.

Duncan: Well now, you probably shouldn’t have boasted about that – I take it as a challenge. The die has been cast, now my pride, reputation and very self worth rests on finding a way to shock you.

 End of Part I of II


Bank Loan Officer – Janet – Sexless marriage – generous husband – bohemian horny woman

Janet processed a loan for me three years ago. She is less stiff than you might think the average banker to be – more bohemian perhaps? Anyway, we hit it off pretty well. I’ve talked with her about the resort-like back yard she’s developed,, concerts she’s gone to – we’ve discussed my relationship status.

I stop by her office and say hello when I happen to go in to my bank.

She helped me roll over a loan recently. She knows I do stuff on the web, or used to, because I used to have a business account with the bank for an online forum/community site I ran. She asked me if I was working on any new sites. I told her I wasn’t doing much – I took a risk and divulged I started this crazy blog. I told her, “don’t even ask the name of it, you might cancel my loan.” She insisted, joked, “Now I’m curious.. you have to tell me, or I might have to cancel your loan.” I told her, “You’re sex Interview.” Of course Janet was curious what the blog was about, (not that the name doesn’t say it all) and I described it. At that point, wasn’t much of a step farther – asking her if she’d like to do an interview. She agreed right away, enthusiastically. Today she came over after work.

Janet is 48 and married. She has long, straight, shiny black hair, 5′ 8″. She’s wearing a white pant suit, nice shoes, looking very banker like.

Duncan: Hi Janet, thank for doing this.

Janet: My pleasure, thank you for inviting me.

Duncan: So you are married?

Janet: I am.

Duncan: How is the sex life?

Janet: It isn’t.

Duncan At all?

Janet: Not at all

Duncan: That sucks.

Janet: Sure does!

Duncan: How long not at all?

Janet: A few years. Before that not so active either.

Duncan: Do you still have desires? Or, have they faded.

Janet: I have desires, absolutely.

Duncan: Nice.

Janet: Plenty desire.

Duncan: How did you meet your husband? What went wrong with sex?

Janet: He worked at the bank, long time ago when I started there. He works for another bank now. He’s twelve years older than me. Didn’t seem to matter too much when I met him, but has been more of an issue the older we’ve become.

Duncan: So He’s 60?

Janet: Yup, just turned 60 last week actually. Threw a big party for him.

Duncan: And you didn’t jump his bones or anything for his birthday.

Janet: I would have if he had wanted. He was in bed by midnight – before that last of my friends had even left.

Duncan: Does your husband know you are here? Doing this interview?

Janet: I’m not here, I’m having dinner with my girlfriend Tracy.

Duncan: What restaurant are you at? What are you ordering?

Janet: Sullivan’s and I just ordered a Cosmo. I think I’ll order the lobster bisque and a salad. Actually, this wine is going down nicely, as you can tell. Thank you.

Duncan: Can I pour you another glass?

Janet: Sure, thanks. How many glasses of wine is equivalent to a couple Cosmos? Three or four at least, right?

Duncan: Probably.

Janet: I do need to drive home, so can’t drink too many.

Duncan: Nice car, you like it?

Janet: Thanks, love it.

Duncan: The bank treating you well I guess?

Janet: Yes, not that well. My husband helped with the car. We might not have sex but the car is almost orgasmic to drive, so..

Car similar to Janet‘s

Duncan: I like your outfit too – it is so banker looking. Do they have a banking clothing store where you people go for these outfits?

Janet: I wish, would make it easier to shop. I came straight from work, otherwise I would have worn something else, less “banker” like.

Duncan: You look good, just formal, like you have a good job at a bank.

Janet: But I am wearing some less conservative underwear for the occasion.

Duncan: You are? So, you expected to show them off? Awesome.

Janet: What? No, I just.. n/m

Duncan: So, you wore sexy underwear for the interview but planned on them not being seen? Busted. LOL

Janet: LOL, I am not busted, shut up.

Duncan: You are, but that’s okay. Well, do you want to describe them, unless you wish to show? Maybe we can find a pic of panties similar online, we’ll post that?

Janet: Sure. Actually, I can probably just show you exact pair on Victoria Secret site.

Embroidered Thong Panty
Embroidered Thong Panty

Duncan: That is what you are wearing?

Janet: Yes, that is them.

Duncan: So you don’t usually wear sexy panties to work?

Janet: I only have a few thong ones. These are newest.

Duncan: Nice. The front looks kind of see through too!

Janet: Yes, they are.

Duncan: Can your bush be seen through them?

Janet: A bit I suppose. My ass can be, LOL.

Duncan: Awesome.

Janet: Thought you might like. Full disclosure, I read a few of your interviews, wore these in case you asked.

Duncan: Well you mentioned them first, so of course I asked.

Janet: True, I did. Guess I wanted you to ask?

Duncan: LOL, fair enough. But you don’t want to show me?

Janet: Alright, pour me another 1/2 glass of wine, I’ll show you, no pics.

Duncan: Cool, deal!.

(Janet stands up, and unzips her pants. She pulls them down, just above her knees? Twists around to show me the back, turns back facing me and pulls her pants back up.)

Duncan: Awesome, they look sexier in person and on you than in the model pics.

Janet: Thanks.

Duncan: That wasn’t so bad was it?

Janet: No, was kind of a thrill. The wine probably helps.

Duncan: A thrill even? Nice, thrilling for me too. For the half second you had your pants down, glad I didn’t blink.

Janet: Oh come one, you got to see.

Duncan: That’s a matter of opinion. I wanted to look for an hour or two.

Janet: I’m sure. You should have asked if you wanted longer. Wouldn’t have been hours.

Duncan: I want longer, minutes?

Janet: I meant while I was showing you.

Duncan: Well I didn’t know I could ask then, so asking now.

Janet: What do you want exactly?

Duncan: To see for a minute or two? Or, for you just to keep your pants off for interview would be fine?

Janet: My pants off for interview? And what if I do?

Duncan: I’ll love it. Love you.

Janet: You’d better!

(Janet reaches down and slips each shoe off. She unzips her pants again, like she’s trying to do it slowly. She takes them off and then sits back down)

Janet: There you go. Here we are.

Duncan: Awesome. So this is thrilling for you?

Janet: Kind of. Surprisingly.

Duncan: Good. Tell me about your sexual fantasies. What are they like? What do you like? Can you tell me a few?

Janet: I like domination fantasy, being controlled. Punished. Ordered around, forced even. Other things too, but that interests me.

Duncan: So when you masturbate, you fantasize about getting ordered around and forced to do stuff?

Janet: Sometimes. Nothing too crazy, mild stuff, non-violent. Tied up, instructed to do things, stuff like that.

Duncan: What’s the naughtiest things you’ve fantasized about?

Janet: Instructed to give oral, on more than one guy. Seduced by someone until I’m saying no but my body is saying yes. Lately been thinking about my boss. He’s a total asshole but attractive.

Duncan: How is he attractive? What have you fantasized about him?

Janet: He’s big, like 6″ 4′, muscular, younger. I’ve though about him making me do stuff. Making me give him oral. Touching me, making me want him even though I hate him.

Duncan: Interesting. You hate him?

Janet: Can’t stand him.

Duncan: But you want to fuck him.

Janet: I guess that is true, part of me. Other part want to kill him.

Duncan: Fascinating dichotomy.

Janet: Yes, I hate it! Hate that I have any desires for him.

Duncan: Have you ever thought about him having intercourse with you, while you were alone masturbating?

Janet: Yes.

Duncan: Who else at work have you imagined sexual contact with?

Janet: One of our bank tellers. He’s really sweet, unlike my boss. Maybe too sweet, but attractive.

 Click here to read the second half of this interview