Morning and you. And I. What a strange year. Strange day and minute right now. Suddenly all this virus stuff happened and I have hardly had to work for months. A few challenging weeks, but I get my work done at home as fast as at the office, minus any time wasted on bullshit to fill in the gaps.
Doing all this writing – very sexual, which might be foolish and I worry about it.
This time in my life is so different than any other – I know there’s some great meaning to be found – I know it will leave me changed – change the course of my life. But I can’t find it yet.
I feel like I need to make use of this one never would have thought it could happen time – this is a pause in the game. I have a queen in my hand with a free chance to play her anywhere, and I haven’t a clue. I’m not sure I care if I win anymore – I’m not even sure if I’m still playing the game. I’m blogging a lot. I can’t find any higher purpose that motivates.
It is almost my birthday. Bought a new car. Every stimulus is here in the mix and I can’t assemble anything profound.
All l want to do is fuck to be blunt. Yes, I know how empty and shallow it sounds, that’s the point of this post – my lackluster making of things.
Interesting flow of thoughts, I’m not sure I understand them but they are peaceful..
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Thank you for reading – while the subject itself was in part about not understanding, the key and purpose and spirit and subtext is peacefulness, completely. I am very happy you got that sense.
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I am feeling this so much on a personal level. Work, writing, personal time and space.
Keep kicking around. The more we embrace our most inane desires and harness our naturally hobbies the more we find and become what we love. And find others who like and love us for it.
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Thank you. Okay, listening.
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Needing to fuck isn’t shallow, it is a definitive. The details can get shallow, who, where, why? I know it feels great, but so do drugs. Sex when looked at as a drug for all the chemical physiological benefits can be just as medicinal or stagnating as any drug. So how would you create medicinal and healing sexual situation?
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